Some Things Shouldn’t Last Forever
For some people, the idea of re-homing a pet for any reason is absolutely not acceptable. I know folks who feel that it’s shameful to ever “give up” on a pet regardless of the circumstances. While I am adamantly opposed to the attitude of pets being disposable, I am also aware that the issue is not always as simple as some might assume.
I do get upset when I see ad after ad on the online classifieds about pets needing new homes because people are moving, getting married, having a baby or are just tired of being a pet owner. It makes me angry when people make impulsive decisions and the dog has to pay the consequence. At the same time, I don’t want any dog to stay in a home where it isn’t wanted, loved and appreciated. In the simple cases where the owners simply don’t want the dog, I am grateful when a new home can be found.
Sometimes, there’s more going on than simple inconvenience or lack of love. Many dogs are re-homed by owners who deeply and truly love them. In fact, it is that love for the dog that gives the owner the strength to let go.
Imagine the home where a dog is growling and snarling at children over food, toys or space. Resource guarding is an issue that a professional trainer can help an owner work through. However, it requires a great deal of management, supervision and work on the part of the entire family. One misstep in the process can mean that a child gets hurt. It isn’t always possible for a busy family to manage the situation in a safe manner.
In my own home, right now, we have an aggression issue going on between two of our dogs. The situation is workable. However, it does mean accepting a certain amount of stress for and possible injury to our eldest dog. At the age of 13 years, we don’t feel it’s fair to him to have to deal with this. We are actively looking for a new home for one of these dogs, and it’s a heartbreaking process.
For some, the problem is separation anxiety. There are many ways to help a dog who suffers from separation anxiety. However, for an owner who works very long hours, is away from home a lot and doesn’t have the resources for things like dog daycare or a pet sitter, the solutions might not be feasible or might not even be in the best interest of the dog.
Sometimes, the most loving thing to do is to let go. Sometimes, the home the dog is in right now is simply a stepping stone to the home the dog needs to be in. Many times, the help the dog really needs cannot be provided in his current environment.
The first dog I ever fostered was an eight year old Border Collie mix who had lived his whole life with one family. He mostly lived outside, but was somehow gentle, loving and house trained. His family decided one day that they just didn’t want him anymore. They wanted a new puppy. Shameful and sad? I think so. However…
This dog was adopted by a sweet, quiet, mature, single woman. I actually saw them fall in love at first sight. After a month together, she brought the dog in for daycare and told me that he needed an expensive hip surgery. I apologized to her, feeling that maybe she felt duped, and explained that if she wasn’t up for it she could certainly return him.
She looked slightly shocked as tears welled up in her eyes and she sobbed, “Oh no! He’s the best thing that ever happened to me! I wouldn’t part with him for the world!”
I cried, she cried some more, and he wagged his tail. I couldn’t help but think how fortunate it was for both her and this wonderful dog that his previous family decided to let him go. Had they not, he would have spent the rest of his years with hip pain, living outdoors and never knowing what it was to really be a family member.
Instead, he was living in a loving home with his own bed, his own yard and a loving companion who would sit on the floor with him and watch movies because he was unable to jump up on the couch.
“Getting rid of a dog” is sometimes a selfish act. Many dogs are simply dumped in the country to fend for themselves. Others are sentenced to death for crimes that don’t fit the punishment. Thousands end up in shelters through no fault of their own. And don’t forget the dog who is kept in his home, but sentenced to a lonely life outdoors, alone. In the midst of all of this are responsible, caring dog owners who for one reason or another need to relinquish their pet.
