Cold, Cold, Nose (sung to the tune of Cold, Cold, Heart)

Your eyes said take me home that day, your tail wagged just for me
It was love at first sight, you know, and everyone could see
I loved your funny ears and face, and so right from the start
You nosed your way into my world and took hold of my heart.

Perfection on four paws you are, without you I’d be blue
But there’s one thing that I wonder, and I’d like to ask of you
And though I know you are my one complete and saving grace
I wonder what it was you licked just now, before you kissed my face.

I wonder what it was you licked before, the thought is killing me
Was it road kill on the street, or some dog’s urine on a tree?
Or before your tongue was on my face, had you just cleaned up your private place?
Please tell me what it was you licked just now, before you kissed my face.

I don’t know where I’d ever find a friend as true as you
You’re more than just a dog to me, my best friend through and through
And so you’ll find, I’ve changed my mind, it’s a closed and finished case
I don’t wanta know what you just licked, before you kissed my face.

I don’t wanta know what you just licked, the thought might do me in
Don’t wanta know ‘bout coprophagia when you’ve just kissed my chin
Don’t wanta know you kissed me on the face after you just cleaned your private place
Please don’t tell me what you licked just now, before you kissed my face.
I don’t want to know what you just licked, before you kissed my face!